A vividly remembered dream conversation experienced 11/2/11 !
ME - Well grandfather tell me about your good old days.
LL - Son, we got more electrified in my time. Electric for heat, lights, cooking, and all manner of other gizmos. All wired directly into the houses. And, we got radio with voices and sounds crossing hundreds or maybe thousands of miles on tiny wires. And, the movies went from speechless stories to colorized talkies. I suppose things may have been a little better then my boyhood days. But honestly, we still had war and your grandmother died from some foreign flu before she reached thirty. Maybe, we think they're good old days because in those past times we were younger, stronger, faster, and had bright dreams.
ME - Any things you wish you could redo in your eighty four years ?
LL - Yes, I'd do all of it different.
ME - What do you mean ?
LL - First, I'd tell you to forget about those "good old days". You know,
thinking too much on yesterdays is not healthy, especially for the living. However, the biggest change I'd make came from a routine experience on the Seaboard. I remember leaving the rail shops in Portsmouth many times on runs to Roanoke. As we got out of town and beyond Suffolk that old Seaboard locomotive would begin to speed along quite smartly. Since I didn't have any chores, I'd relax and stare out the window at the passing scenery. Sometimes, despite the clacking of the rails, I would even catch a few minutes, maybe hours, of shuteye. Well son, on one of those runs it dawned on me that life was just a long series of Kodak snapshots like the ever changing view out my speeding rail car window. With each new second a new picture would appear out the window and I begun to think that life was maybe the same way.
ME - Whatever do you mean ?
LL - You see when I was a boy I was taught to plan for the future. Do well in school, get a good job, go to church, listen to your doctor, obey the boss, and all that stuff. Well I tried to live that way for a long time. But, after I got beat so bad by those thugs, Annie died, and her family sent all our kids to orphanages I began to think different. I thought a lot about watching the scenery flash by like a slow moving picture show and everything became very clear.
ME - I'm confused. How did you begin thinking differently and what became clear ?
LL - Simple. I made a deal with the Lord that I would live minute to minute and not get too worried about all the planning and worrying part of living. Because you see, I realized that life was like a long series of photographs reflecting every second you live as a separate picture in time. Since I had no control over what I might see speeding along on that train how could I control the good and bad things that would happen in my life. So, I decided to put on a smile, trust the Lord and know that whatever else was going to happen in my life would just happen. I'd just do my best and find the happy side of whatever happened.
ME - Is this why you lived with many different people, went to different churches practically every Sunday, and barely recognized your son, my father, or me ?
LL - Maybe. You know, a lot of folks say that after my beating and Annie died, I got a little touched in the noggin. Began to forget things and people. Maybe that's what happened. But, honestly I think I got smarter getting off the regular way most folks live their lives. After awhile I figured all I could offer anyone was myself, my smiles, and my love. Maybe that's why so many folks in Deep Creek took care of me for so long. They began calling me Lamb and Lambie Pie even though my middle initial was really for Lafayette. I did my best to be gentle and peaceful with everyone and I was blessed with kindness from everyone I encountered. Nobody ever bothered or hurt me on purpose or out of meanness over those last forty some years. I was happy and so enjoyed all the good folks, their churches, and the wonderful singing.
ME - Are you in heaven Grandfather ?
LL - I'm not sure. But, I know everyone here is calm, bright, and happy. I see my beloved Annie Mae, my beautiful children, The Culpepper's, and my old friends and neighbors all the time. It's wonderful and it gets better all the time.
ME - What advice can you give me ?
LL - First, if you're a church person it's OK. If you're not a church person don't worry. All those churches on earth have little to do with the Almighty One. The churches don't know that and most of the folks mean well. Getting past life is a place and time too complex for anyone to understand so just relax about all that. Always trust on a better world on the other side of your life. Finally, forget about planning so much and thinking about the past. Live each day as a gift and keep in motion. Make friends everyday, smile a lot, and always remember that each day is a snapshot of your short time on earth. Just as that old locomotive got faster and the scenes clipped by faster and faster as you get older each of those days will speed by quicker and quicker. Be peaceful my grandson and I'll see you soon.
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