ME for PREZ - Why Not ?

Since the days of Truman I have been a keen observer of our Presidents. In my opinion, most have been rascals, smoozers, jackasses, and charlatans. As my brain cells begin to decrease and vanish, I feel qualified to seek this grand office.

To my credit and in keeping with the current political trend I have zero experience as a public servant. While I like the independence of the tea party folks I cannot find their clear platform statement. The Libertarians have a clear agenda chocked full of sweeping generalizations but they harbor a few bizzaro ideas I cannot support. The elephant and donkey parties have platforms so complex they cover every political impulse from cannabalism to miracle whip.

Personally, I have always favored the constitution. With only an occasional revision it is our ultimate and best guide to good governance. I sincerely believe the federal government should have the sole task of protecting it's citizens from enemies alien and homegrown. I think the best government is the least and that which is conducted at the state and local level.

I believe the " War Powers " act should be abolished to ensure no cover for federal legislators. If our troops are expected to make war they need the majority support of congress. The wishy washy behavior of federal lawmakers since the Korean War is an unforgivable sin against our young and willing warriors.

I think most of the federal alphabet agencies are bad ideas which should be dismatled. They are expensive red tape factories which would be gradually shuttered in the first 6oo days of my administration. Education, charity, transportation, banking, businesses large and small, mail, home loans, trains, school menus, labor relations, etc. are all matters which should live and die in a free market.

I would support strict term limits for all federal elected officials. Twelve years maximum at the executive, legislative, and judicial branch with no retirement plan and no crossovers from one branch to the other. After those twelve years I would insist upon a firm prohibition from becoming a lobbyist of any stripe. No federal funds for any candidates and pay raises only at the majority vote of the electorate.

As my first campaign pledge I would take down the IRS. I favor Boortz and Linder with " The Fairtax Book " plan or something equally reasonable and simple. The more money left in the hands of the citizens the better. The federal government has never produced wealth or prosperity.

This is not my total agenda for reform. Obviously I need some financial support to publicize more of my plans. Please send along any rolled or loose change and small denomination US currency to further my dark horse candidacy.

My final promise is to update my campaign platform as donations warrant and after enjoying this afternoons "early bird" special at the Picadilly.